Aunty Maude; The Tale That WAGd The Dog.

I’m so excited! My niece told me recently that she had joined the WAGs! I’m so happy for her – I don’t mind telling you that I was beginning to have some doubts about her…..quite a handful, she was becoming. Well, there you are – never lose faith; we were all young once.

I’m not sure who the WAGs are, but I joined the WRENS during the War, and I can tell you, we had a fair bit of fun, we did! All for a good cause, mind you. (That awful man with the little moustache was being an absolute beast on the Continent. Made his presence felt in England, too. Quite wrecked the place. Well, we taught him to mind his “p’s” and “q’s”, we did - with a little help from the others, of course.)

I suppose WAGs must be something similar. My niece, Jane, tells me that they’re quite involved with sporting activities. (Football, I think she said.) I remember how much fun we had in the WRENS, supporting our local regiments in their sporting matches – mostly cricket, in those days, but football and rugby too. Looked very dashing in their white attire, they did. Very good for morale, it was; kept up the spirits. Good clean fun.

I shouldn’t say this, but the socials after the matches weren’t always quite so clean! Quite frisky, some of those lads were, I can tell you! But certainly good for OUR morale! (Good Heavens, what would my mother say if she heard a remark like that?) Well, can’t live in the Dark Ages, can we? Must move with the times; far more open now – too open, if I may be so bold.

Never mind, good healthy activities will be good for our Jane. Won’t do her any harm to learn a bit of decorum and proper presentation. (She mentioned that proper attire was terribly important, so that’ll do her good. No fashion sense at all, to my mind. Won’t do her any harm to learn from those in the know.) I told my friends about it and they’re all very happy for her, though none of them seemed to know much about WAGs. My young nephew, Neville, will be over for a visit shortly, so perhaps I could ask him.

Ah, Here’s Neville Now! Do Excuse Me …

Well, THAT was uncalled for! I simply asked Neville if he knew anything about the WAGs, and he told me to “Google It”! Don’t know what got into him, he’s normally such a nice, placid young man. He doesn’t LOOK annoyed or anything; just sitting at the computer as if nothing happened. How awkward.

What’s that, Neville? You FOUND something about WAGs? On the computer? How very clever of you! You must show me how you did that. Well, shift over, young man, let me see ….

Ah, here we are, let’s see what they say. .…..

Ah, yes, there you are …..

Oh, that’s interesting……

Oh ……?

Oh, dear …….

Oh, My …..

Oh, dear me …


Oh Shit.